Sherri Ross

I know there are events in our lives that make us stronger people…that mold us into who we are. Moving to DC was one of those events for me. While I love living here, it hasn’t been easy. There have been obstacles to overcome when all I wanted to do was flee back to Alabama…to home…where my friends and family wait for me. And yes, I do mean wait. There are friends who bet me that I would be back by Christmas. I assured them I wouldn’t, but there were times when I feared they may be right. I guess fear is the wrong word. The decision to move here was a long, thought-out process..one that I couldn’t have made without the help of friends. One of my biggest hesitations was the fear of failing. What if I didn’t make it and had to come home? What if I hated it and came crawling back with my tail between my legs? What if I just couldn’t stay above water? A dear, very wise friend told me that it wasn’t failing if I never tried. And it wasn’t failing period. I think it just took her reasoning and wonderful assurance that I wouldn’t be a failure even if I did come home because I did do it..it just didn’t work out for whatever reason. And she assured me that I need not worry what my friends and family would think because they would never consider me a failure for having the courage to do it. And she assured me that I would always be welcome with open arms no matter how long (or little) I stayed in DC.

Tonight I’m missing that friend, along with all the others. And my family. I miss them a lot, but I have a wonderful family here now and I’m blessed to have family in all corners of the country now. I’m blessed, but still missing them. I miss her infectious laugh and the way she brightens any room the minute she smiles. I miss the friend who knows me better than anyone and who knows what I’m thinking without a word. I miss the friend who has helped me through the toughest times in my life and is the rock that I lean on. I miss the friend I grew up with..the one I know I can always pick up where we left off. I miss the friend who helped me grow up and helped make me into the woman I am today…I hope I am half the woman she is. I miss the friend who is struggling with her own demons right now, but has helped me in ways she’ll never know. I miss the friend lost over stupid immaturity before it was too late. I miss the friend who took care of me for many years and still does. I miss the friend who thinks that I’ll never be replaced. I miss the friend who I connected with online and then in person. I miss the mother I reconnected with and who has become so much more since. I miss the friend who took my mind off things when I poured my heart out to her at dinner every week. And I miss my dad like nobody’s business. This is a post to let you all know you’re thought of, loved and missed. Tonight and every.

Not many people know this about me (I think maybe just my dad): For many years, as a child, I wanted to be an entomologist when I grew up. I wanted to study and play with insects all day. I used to catch, dissect, analyze under my microscope and set fire with a magnifying glass anything creepy, crawly thing I could get my hands on when I was young.

There’s your “Huh, I didn’t know that” lesson for today.

In that same vein, I wanted to be a teacher and psychologist. Psychologist and not psychiratrist because a) I didn’t care about prescribing people drugs – I just wanted to listen to their issues and try to help and b) it was already a lot of schooling before you stuck med school on top of it. The psychologist thing lasted for years. Starting when I was 12. For YEARS. Actually, it’s still a bit of a dream for me. So is the teacher thing. Not so much the entomologist anymore..although I’m not completely opposed to it.

I hope my friends and family say kind things about me. Going through old posts and just reviewing life in general, I’ve realized (and sometimes known) that things tend to be “about me” a lot. When I used to see a therapist, I mentioned this narcissism and she didn’t totally buy into it. No matter…I’m still convinced. I don’t necessarily think that it always has to be about me…I like to think/hope that I have a big heart and am generous and thoughtful of other people – more so than myself. That may not always be the case realistically. I will say this (in my defense..not that anyone is attacking me): I tend to blog about my thoughts, my feelings and my actions because it is my blog. I like to discuss and analyze people and their actions and how they affect me. There are more layers to me and more in-depth things I like to discuss, albeit usually in person.

That being said, here are my latest observations:

I went to town this morning for a few job interviews (town = D.C.). I arrived at my second one quite early, so I ordered a Coke at a local watering hole near the interviewing office. Having only been in this part of town a few times thus far, I wasn’t familiar with the establishment. (man, I’m starting to sound like Dawson’s Creek kids). In other words, I found a place that was barely occupied, bellied up to the bar and ordered a tall cold one. It was a local, “neighborhood” place where everyone knew each other, people came by every day to visit (mostly older men I found out) and it had been around for years. The three gentlemen in the bar with me were very pleasant and more than happy to answer my questions about the area. I’ve heard it said before and now have found it to be true: It’s very rare to find a born and bred Washingtonian. Most are transplants from other areas. These guys had lived in the area their entire lives. They told me that the bar, “L’il Pub,” had been around when they were children – it was called “Little Tavern” back then. The office buildings down the street used to be movie “houses” that you could get into for a QUARTER!

They didn’t mind me overhearing the conversations they had amongst themselves either. And they were more than kind to explain particulars of people or places they were talking about if they caught me listening/paying attention. When they thought I was reading my paper they spoke of a friend of theirs – Joe – who had recently passed. The questions started: Did any of the others know exactly what happened? When was the last time one of them had talked to him? Had he been sick? After the questions, came the remarks. “He was such a nice guy.” “He never let anyone talk about his friends (negatively).” “He was a prodigy as a child. A very talented painter his whole life. His works are overseas all over the place.”

Before, during, and after the discussion about Joe, one of the gentleman kept passing around a card for ‘Nancy’. She was going into the hospital for surgery and would everyone like to sign the card? People who stopped in to say hi to the bartender/owner, Howard, and the resident token photographer, Michael, were asked to sign this card for Nancy.

People like this group of older men move me. They inspire me. They make me check myself because one day I want my friends to say the same things about me. That’s a good measure of a great person and a wonderful friend.

I’ll definitely be back to that l’il pub..even though I may be considered an outsider because I don’t live in the neighborhood. There, as an outsider, I felt more at home than I have in a lot of places I grew up in or around.

Two post scripts:
1. Michael – the photographer – older, retired gentleman just launching a photography business because he “loves it. If it takes off, great. If not, so what. It’s what I love to do.” His web site will be (once it’s up and running) www.shotsfromacanon.com. Check the site out in a few months and see if it’s up. I told him I would keep checking and maybe order some photography. He wasn’t selling it and didn’t ask – I offered. He had his portfolio with him and most were breathtaking pictures of the natural beauty and architecture of our capital city.

2. My Dawson’s Creek fetish has passed – by force. They no longer come on every morning on TBS at 9 a.m. Now it’s sporadic – an episode here, an episode there – that Tivo still seems to catch. Woe is me, but it’s ok. I don’t need all that DC with the new fall shows starting! What’s on your must-see list this fall? Mine (in no particular order – and don’t laugh!) are:

One Tree Hill (I’m just going to go ahead and get that one out of the way now)
Grey’s Anatomy
House
Private Practice
Big Shots
Family Guy
Ugly Betty
The Office
The Tyra Banks Show
Flip This House
Property Ladder
Tori & Dean: Inn Love (Lee, I’m gonna hurt you for getting me hooked on this!)
Rock of Love with Bret Michaels (Ash, I’m gonna hurt you for getting me hooked on this!)

I won’t keep all of those as the season goes on, but that’s what I’m starting with. The poor Tivo box.

I went to the US Marine Corps War Memorial today. The statue itself is moving, but I had obviously come after a group of kids who left wreaths and letters for the solders who have given their lives for us. I took some pictures, including a letter that brought me to tears.

In case you can’t make it out, here is most of what the letter says:

September 14, 2007

Dear Soldier,

Hi! I’m 11 yrs. old and from Georgia. I’m writing to you because I’m in a forum called People to People.

Anyways, do you have any favorite hobbies?
How old were you when you joined the army?
Were you scared?
Did your family worry?
Are you married and do you have kids?
What was your job?

Here is some good news:

You guys won the war if you didn’t know.
Also, your name is on a memorial. Isn’t that (neat?? Not sure of the exact word)

(That means pretty awesome)

Well, I hope you’re happy up in Heaven.

Tell God I say Hi! (Don’t worry about my name, God knows who I am)

– A Friend

Please send this along to anyone you want to. I thought it was moving. I looked up the program and you can find out more info about it here if you want: http://www.studentambassadors.org.

A year ago or so I had a friend send me the link to Matt Harding and his dancing self doing his goofy jig all over the world. In case you haven’t seen it (but you probably have), you can check out the video at www.wherethehellismatt.com. I saw last year’s (2006) and fell in love with the craziness instantly..much like the Free Hug Campaign video that Jen sent to me a while back. Well, once I saw Matt’s video and how much fun he was having, I signed up to be notified of upcoming shoots. Matt brought the video crew to D.C. today and I danced like a monkey. He’s shooting his latest video which will be released June 21, 2008 and hopefully I’ll make the cut. Either way, he’s a great guy doing something totally fun and Stride is sponsoring his trip seen ’round the world. I have video of all the dancing the group did today, but here’s my personal fave…Matt and I in our finest hour dancing on the Mall. I’ll be sure to post his video once it’s completed next year. Find out more about him, his goofy dancing and his adventures on the road at the site above. Enjoy!