health – Sherri Ross

Category: health

29
Nov
2019

My First Surgery

Me before surgery — See? Don’t I look totally normal and calm right here? FOOLED YA!

Having your first surgery at 44 poses its own set of questions/challenges/risks/whatever you want to call them. I call them “I’m the biggest baby in the world, so I’m freaking out no matter what” things. 1. I’m scared to death of death. So being put under general anesthesia – basically the CLOSEST THING TO DEATH BESIDES DEATH – is not on my bucket list right now. 2. I have sleep apnea so let’s just ADD SOME MORE INSANITY TO THAT FEAR. 3. I’m overweight so let’s just ADD SOME MORE INSANITY TO THAT FEAR. 4. I’ve never been put under for anything so let’s just ADD SOME MORE INSANITY TO THAT FEAR. Seriously, I could go on like this all day.

After talking to a few people about my IRRATIONAL FEAR OF BEING PUT UNDER (yes, I type like I talk and I talk like I type) I calmed down quite a bit. Many of the folks I talked to who had surgeries before actually liked the anesthesia. Some said it was the best sleep they ever had, some likened the relaxation stuff they give you in the IV prior to being put to sleep to the happy gas they give you at the dentist, some said they don’t remember a thing therefore they love it. A few people said they didn’t like it or had bad reactions to it, but they were far and few between. I absolutely LOVE the gas at the dentist and the more people I talked to, the more I got the impression that was how I was going to feel before I even got fully under so I was ok by the time I got to surgery yesterday. Or so I thought.

I was pretty ok during check in and pre-op. I lost it a little when the anesthesiologist came in and started talking to me about the tube down my throat. For some idiotic reason I figured I would have a mask on. But, they can’t very well do surgery on my sinuses up through my nasal cavities if I’m wearing a mask, can they? So when he started mentioning a tube down my throat and stuff, I lost it a bit until Daniel was able to come back with me after they got my IV started. Daniel always calms me down.

They had my IV in they gave me propranolol well before taking me into surgery, but I don’t think it was enough. I thought I would be ‘dentist happy-gas relaxed’ by the time I got to the OR and I wouldn’t care what they did with me (pretty much how I feel at the dentist when I’m on that stuff), but when I got to the OR I was quite aware and scared of what was going on when they started sticking monitors on me and I could hear things start beeping. Nope, nope, nope, nope, nope, nope. I wasn’t having it and I was petrified. I was not relaxed and told them – I also burst into tears. I heard someone ask if I had been given propranolol and someone else said yes. I yelled, “Not enough!” and asked for more. That’s the last thing I remember before waking up.

The next thing I know I was waking up to a bunch of people hovering over me saying, “It’s all over. You did great. See? It was nothing.” And whisking me somewhere else. They were right. It was easy, painless, and awesome. But I definitely needed more propranolol before going into that OR. Oh my word, that was scary as hell!

24
Nov
2019

My Top 5 Distractions

categories: #bloglikecrazy, health

I looooove to procrastinate when it comes to chores and not-so-fun things I have to do or deal with on a personal level. My dad knows this, Daniel knows this, anyone close to me knows this. I’m not proud of it, but I am working on it. I thought I’d share my top 5 distractions these days and how I’m working on combatting them when they arise.

Sleeping. This is my number one distraction, by far. I’m not sure if it’s due to a medical condition/conditions or what, but I’m working through that theory. Hence my surgery this week. So, that’s how I’m combatting that distraction…going down the line of possibilities and trying to eliminate them. Sinus infections/issues, hormones, Sjogrens, Hashimoto’s, etc. ALL THE THINGS. I use my weekends to catch up on sleep. You’d think I had triplets or something as much as I like to sleep on the weekends. This is another reason it’s taking me forever to unpack.
Social Media is probably number 2. It’s not as bad as it used to be, thankfully, but I can still get lost on Instagram or TikTok for far longer than I’d like to admit. When I find myself spending too much time on them I put down the phone or close the computer and pick up something substantial – either my Kindle (if I’m still in a mind mood) or laundry or a box to unpack if I need to do something with my hands.
Television is almost as bad as social media for me. Thankfully we don’t have cable or I fear it would be a lot worse. But we do have all of the digital stuff – Hulu, Amazon, Netflix, Disney+, and a lot of other channels on the Roku that suck me in too many hours that I’d like to admit. I allow myself some TV time, but I try hard not to watch too much “fluff” TV, which is my favorite. If I find myself starting down that path I try to at least change to something educational like a documentary or the like. Baby steps, ya know? lol.
Shopping (window). I love to window shop online. I can spend hours looking at things I’d love to buy, but never do. Clothes, shoes, things for the home, places I want to go, etc. I put tons of things in my cart just for fun, but never check out. The only time I actually shop is if I have a coupon or someone is having a huge sale. If I am spending too long window shopping and I have something I need to get done I close my tab and lose my cart. It’s so sad and all my stuff is gone. lol.
Literally anything else than what I need to do. lol. I am just a procrastinator. But, the reality is that when I finally do whatever it is that I need(ed) to do I’m so happy it’s over with that I’m ecstatic. WHY DON’T I JUST DO IT AND GET IT OVER WITH? I am my father’s daughter. lol. It runs in our family. 🙂 So, yes, we’ll still be unpacking boxes in 2 years from our move and we *might* invite you over in like 5 years to our *new* place. Hold your breath.

24
Nov
2019

Thank You for the Blog Love

categories: #bloglikecrazy, health

image by victor u

It’s another twofer so enjoy!

First off, I cannot thank you enough for all of the messages, texts, comments, and posts after sharing my recent weight story. So many of you reached out with words of encouragement, support, and love. It’s hard putting yourself out there for the world to see – especially when you tack your actual weight to it – but you all were so accepting and positive and I should have known you would be. I truly have the most amazing friends.

I will tell you the best thing about writing that post – seeing so many comments from the people who inspire me in their wellness journeys. I don’t always speak up, but I follow many, many of you on FB, IG, Twitter, and the like. And I know many of you are or have been on your own wellness journeys through the years. I follow a lot of you and look to you regularly for inspiration. So, for any of you who might have gotten a nudge from my story, chances are I got one (or more) from you first in the past year or years. So thank YOU for being transparent and always being real in your posts. It helps so much more than you know, even if I don’t tell you. I’m watching. And so are others. 💕

19
Nov
2019

Twofer Tuesday!

categories: #bloglikecrazy, health

It happened again. I FELL ASLEEP before I got to post to my blog yesterday so you get TWO posts today! It’s TWOFER TUESDAY!

Up first, guess who’s having surgery next week???? This girl! Guess who’s never had surgery before? This girl! Guess who’s SCARED TO DEATH TO HAVE SURGERY? THIS GIRL! It’s very minor surgery, but I am still SCARED STIFF. I’ve never been put under. ACK. It’s Balloonaplasty or something. I dunno. They’re gonna put little balloons in my nose and I’m going to fly up to the sky like in the movie “Up.” Just kidding. That would be so cool. I am having balloon sinuplasty – that’s what it’s called. They are sticking little skinny balloons up my nostrils and inflating them to get out all the gunk clogging up my sinuses. I have a lot of gunk apparently. Totally blocked in one side and mostly blocked on the other. And my upper sinuses are all kinda funky, too.

I’ve had chronic sinus problems for as long as I can remember. I’ve had a sinus infection for the last 6 months. I also have crazy bad allergies and recently had allergy testing redone. It turns out I’m allergic to ALL.THE.THINGS. Still. The biggest one being yeast. DAGNABBIT. I love yeast. Oh, well. We’ll tackle one thing at a time. Sinus surgery first and then allergy shots or dissolvables or something.

Anyway, if you don’t mind, send some good juju and prayers my way next week for a safe, easy surgery and even easier recovery. I’m one terrified bunny and you know what scared bunnies look like…they just shake and poop A LOT.

06
Nov
2019

I Don’t Remember That

categories: #bloglikecrazy, health

I’ve wrestled with this issue my entire life (as far as I can remember): I can’t remember things from my past. I can’t remember how I met most of my friends, I can’t remember movies I know I’ve seen before, I can’t remember important milestones. I’ve gone on entire vacations and don’t remember any part of them.

I don’t know if it’s normal or not, but I definitely don’t feel like it is. (What is normal anyway? lol) I talk to friends who are able to tell me detailed accounts of nights we’ve spent having fun at the beach and they can’t believe I can’t recall any of it. I’ve had former roommates recount numerous tales of us living together, but I don’t remember any of them. I believe them, of course, because I’ve been like this my entire life. But sometimes it really upsets me that I can’t seem to remember my own life. I am grateful for all of you who put the pieces together for me when needed and don’t judge me for it. But if you’ve ever wondered why I take so many pictures of anything and everything now you know. I take pictures so I can look at them later because I know I likely won’t remember it. I have thousands and thousands of pictures documenting good times with friends, family, or just something I want to remember later.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not completely blank inside. I do have memories; they are just few and far between considering my life span and the amount of experiences I’ve actually had. I have snippets here and there of when I was younger and lived in Wisconsin with my mother…those aren’t that great. A previous therapist believes that may be when it all started – she thinks I may have learned long ago to block out things as a coping mechanism (for what, I have no idea) and that may be a possible explanation as to why I can’t remember as much as other people. But it also may just be that I don’t pay attention to details as much as others. It could be any number of things. But I do have memories of the rest of my life…with my dad, the my family, my friends, and the like. The more recent the activity the more likely I am to remember it. But sometimes the memory loss really comes in handy….I can see the same movie three times and it seem brand new to me every time. It’s almost like “50 First Dates” in my head some days. lol.

In all my years of therapy I have learned two things about my condition: it doesn’t affect my work and it only affects my life and no one else’s, as in I remember things and details about those close to me. Again, therapy suggests it’s because I care about those close to me so much and want to ensure I’m listening to them when they tell me things or when things are happening to them.

So, now you know that I’m not an airhead, I just have a crappy memory. lol. I try very hard to remember things, especially if you tell me something. But, if I do forget and have to ask again once or twice, please understand why and don’t be upset. Now, who wants to go see a movie? 😉