That Time I Cried in Belk – Pt 2

It’s 2016 and I’m at my heaviest weight ever, 336 lbs. If you missed part 1 of how I got to this point, you can catch up here.

I know I’m still beautiful and all that jazz, but it’s obvious that I’m having problems now due to my weight. My clothes don’t fit anymore, I’m having a harder time with certain movements, and public limitations are starting to rear their ugly heads. Booths in restaurants, seats at theaters, and the like are more often becoming problems for me now.

Besides the obvious physical issues, my health was of great concern. To quote my doctor at my physical that year, “You need to do something or we’re going to need to discuss surgery. And you don’t want surgery.” That’s when it hit me hard.

I had tried numerous things that just weren’t working. Weight Watchers, gyms, paleo, this, that, etc. I know it all comes down to me, but I wasn’t cutting it. She asked me if I wanted to try an appetite suppressant that WASN’T phentermine or whatever it was way back when. It was a combo of Wellbutrin (an antidepressant I had been on before) and something else. One of the side effects of Wellbutrin is appetite suppression. I was very hesitant because I’m a logical, reasonable human. I a) know all the stuff “they” say about taking pills to lose weight – I’m one of “them.” b) I don’t want to take a pill for the rest of my life to keep weight off. c) Pills are only a temporary solution. d) Is this safe? e) etc. etc. etc. I checked out the medication online and talked to my psychiatrist about it – I wanter her input on it since it contained Wellbutrin and I trust her more than my GP when it comes to these types of medications. She’s a specialist in those types of medications, after all. After doing all the research and weighing it with the options of surgery I decided to give it a try.

The medication worked wonders for me. It took a while to titrate up to the full dose and once I did I realized I didn’t need it. The full dose made me a little jittery. So I took half the prescribed dosage and lost nearly 100 pounds over all. I will admit that I didn’t do it consistently. I started the medication in 2017 and then stopped it for a bit and then started it again, seriously, at the end of 2018. I think that’s when friends and family noticed the most weight loss, in the last year. I was 336 and now I’m 245. Besides the benefits of my clothes fitting again and being able to sit in booths and at the movie theater, my doctor is very happy and all my blood work/levels look great – even ones that were a little iffy before.

I stopped the medication about two months ago to give my body a rest and reset. It’s probably not the best time to do it – right at the holidays – but I wanted to take a break and also see if I would eat everything in sight if I wasn’t on it. I’m happy to report that while I’m a little hungrier than I was before, I’ve still been able to maintain small meals and intermittent fasting (which I practice healthily). Part of the extra hunger comes from a new medication that I recently started for something else – one of the side effects is increased hunger. So yeah, not the greatest time to stop my other medication either, but I can do it.

Now we’re getting to the good part! WHY DID I CRY IN BELK, YOU ASK? Come back tomorrow and I’ll tell you. Turns out, there’s a part 3!